Sex and the Austen Girl (& a BIG giveaway)

You know I've joined this great Austenish adventure, the Everything Austen Challenge, and at the moment I'm completing my third task, that is reading my first modern fiction inspired to the world of Jane's novels: RUDE AWAKENINGS OF A JANE AUSTEN ADDICT by LAURIE VIERA RIGLER.
Stephanie at Stephanie's Written Word has given us this wonderful occasion to blog to a purpose, revive our love for Jane and improve and enrich our knowledge. And today she's done even more: she's posted something written by Laurie Viera Rigler, thet is she in person is Stephanie's guest today! Now, if you comment her extremely interesting contribute about "Sex and the Austen Girl", you can take part in a big giveaway : you might win two novels by this brilliant writer and Janeite! You simply have to answer a question in your comment:

"Have you ever wondered how our dating rules and rituals today might look to someone from Jane Austen’s England? Are we better off now, or would we be better off back then?

Click here, read the interesting post, comment, and ...GOOD LUCK!

P.S.This is my comment on Stepahnie's blog, this is what I answered Laurie's question:

"Guess what! I 've just stopped reading "Rude Awakenings" - which is my third task for the challenge - to see if there were something interesting in my blog roll and ... here I am commenting this wonderful post! Thank you Stephanie for giving us all these great opportunities. Your Everything Austen Challenge is becoming more and more fun everyday! Now... My answer to Laurie's question: I think our modern straightahead way of approaching each other, get acquainted, have a free sexual relationship has stolen much from our emotional life more than adding much. No magic, little romance, no delayed gratification so ... quick disillusionment and boredom!
That's all! I'll go and post about it on my blog!"

Do you agree with me? Was it better at Jane Austen's time? Is it better now?


Kimberly H. said...

I hear you and nod my head yes.
We have lost so much dignity in the last few decades. I believe in freedom of but would love to see some of the restraints of Austen's era returned.

And now that I know you are part of the JA challenge, I will be checking in more.

Maria Grazia said...

I too, of course, understand we MUST appreciate the freedom we've reached but ...I'm glad I'm not the only nostalgic one! You'll be welcome whenever you want to pass by!

Anonymous said...


I also appreciate the freedom. It would be oppressing to live in such a society after they way I have led my life. But I too sometimes feel nostalgic. I think all the rules that apply to winning a man not only adds dignity to the process, but makes it more romantic. There's this "forbidden" feeling to it all.

Maria Grazia said...

"Forbidden". It is a key word. When something is forbidden you start dreaming about it, longing to discover more, looking forward to getting to it. But since forbidden things are seen as unacceptable today, our great yet esteemable freedom has stolen us much: the power to wish for , dream about, long wait for something and once you get to it after some "journey" to be able to deeply and really appreciate it. I hope I was clear. Thanks for your contribution, June.

Michelle said...

mmm I feel like I'm going to sound like I'm sitting on the fence but I'm not really. I probably wouldn't want to live in a society where the women were dependant so much on the approval of men and romance was a matter of luck but I agree that today's society disregards morality far too much.

Set rules for yourself, draw your lines and don't cross them. Don't compromise yourself just for approval or out of fear of rejection.

I have a theory that people don't question their feelings enough today. Just because we feel something or have an urge to do something doesn't mean we should do it. I'm not overly romantic but I do believe that a healthy relationshp, where both parties are in love and respect each other, is magical and is true bliss.

Maria Grazia said...

@Michelle Magill
Good points, Michelle. I totally agree with you. I don't think I could accept Regency society's discrimination toward women: no possession, no profession, no freedom. But then I can't bear what is happening to us today.I'm not that romantic either, but quite realistic. What worries me is that, for ex., a long-lasting love relationship is absolutely rare,a miracle!

Nicole said...

Hm, I like the concept of free dating--that women can fraternize with (and sleep with) many different men before choosing a permanent partner.

However... I do find myself drawn to the conventions of Austen's era in terms of the way courting was done. Meeting at a ball, with an introduction provided by a trusted friend, developing an acquaintance that blossoms from friendship into something so much more, does sound SOOOO much more appealing than getting picked up on at a bar. I mean, who can possibly appear at an advantage in that situation? Even if a guy is a perfectly amazing catch, there's just an automatic creep factor associated with meeting someone at a bar (to me, at least).

Despite all our freedom, it seems like it's just as hard to meet decent people as it ever was.

Maria Grazia said...

Thanks for your interesting contribution, N. And , of course, you're right, a bar is nothing, compared to a Regency Ball!

Lucy said...

Hi:) I entered the giveaway too with a comment on this...And- I have to agree with you- times seemed to be a lot better. I kind of focused on the whole technology bit that's taken away from people using their face-to-face social graces. It's gotten too fast paced- especially when it comes to things that need time and patience to nurture;) Love your post!

Maria Grazia said...

@Ms. Lucy
Thanks Lucy. You are always terribly kind. You are welcome because you're contributions are always special.

Michelle said...

agree about the ball vs bar but we had that not so long ago - don't have to go back to regency days to find it. My parents and my husbands parents both talk about the 'dances' they used to attend. My husband's grandmother would take a horse and buggy ride for nearly a whole day just to attend a community dance. People met, talked and danced. The primary goal was meeting someone - not getting drunk. When nightclubs starting putting in 'quiet rooms' I realised they had started to see a problem. Their clientele wasn't there to socialise anymore - just there to drink - not to meet people - those people stay away and use dating services!!

Maria Grazia said...

@Michelle Magill
Guess what! I usually read or watch scenes from Jane Austen's novels referring to her famous balls and ask my students to notice the differences from their parties. Well, I've sadly learnt a lot about how "miserable" these events can be! Then, I've got an 18-year-old son...and I'm becoming an expert. There's no charm and no magic in what I learn from them.